Monday, October 24, 2011

Resolving Conflict: Squashing Rumors 2

One thing I've learned over the past several years is that when someone comes to me and says, "I heard...", it almost always ends poorly.

See, if they've heard a rumor about me (assuming it's false), I can tell them the truth; but that will only last until they go back to the original source of the rumor. Then, they find themselves in the awkward situation of having to believe one person and therefore decide the other is a liar.

There is a better way.

I've made it a personal policy to NOT answer those who ask me about rumors. I simply ask them to come back with the person from whom they heard this. That way, we can work together to find out where the truth lies, and no one gets stuck in the middle. (my assumption is that anyone who says something about me to someone else will be happy to say it to me, right?)

I would recommend everyone make this their policy.
1. Don't defend yourself against a rumor unless the originator of the rumor is there.
2. Don't ask someone else about a rumor unless you have the originator of the rumor with you.
3. BY ALL MEANS, don't pass along a rumor... under ANY circumstances.

All the Posts in This Series:
5 Ways to Let Go of a Grudge
3 Steps to Being a Peacemaker
5 Questions to Help Evaluate Yourself
6 Roadblocks That Shut Down Communication
Squashing Rumors

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